Miracle of the Lap

I was eating Cheerios. He is playing. Pushing chairs around. Now picking things up off of the floor and putting them in the trashcan. Things like the Cheerios that he recently and ceremoniously ejected from the table himself. He plays by himself in long stretches but mostly stays within my aura, only wandering a little further away for brief moments, but at those times he bounds back into the room where I am and up into my arms. Wanting a kiss. Then release and off again.

But at some point he climbs up into my lap. Just to sit there, wanting that closeness with Mama.

This is such a special stage of independence. Everyone assumes that independence is all about letting go. But if that were true we would all live isolated and never see anyone else. A hermit, incidentally, does not live in isolation. For a hermit can only be seen as living solitary in relationship to her/his community. Otherwise you are just a nut reputed to live in the desert or forest. No contact.

Closeness is such an important part of independence and of developing healthy relationships with people and God and saints and angels. My son is not sitting here in my arms by default. We are nursing less than ever now. Mostly just after he wakes up from his nap, sometimes also in the morning when he wakes up, sometimes not at all. But his need for love, for closeness, for spiritual sharing through physical touch as not disappeared. Now he chooses. He chooses to be hugged. To try the cereal with milk that I am eating. We share our energy back and forth, loving.

Adults need that closeness, too, and too many of us are out of the habit.
Closeness, physical touch from friends, neighbors, lovers in kindness, creates a spiritual awareness. Give a peaceful handshake instead of a hurried one. Put a hand on a shoulder. Sit close. Draw someone in for a hug or a side-arm embrace. Place a hand on someone's arm, look them in the eye, say Thank-you.

Choose.

Choose to pay attention to the people in your life. Choose to Love.

In the Beginning, there was Breastfeeding

Put your left foot in...
I'd like to post every day. So I have been working on re-design of my layout to this flowering red design, and coming up with a writing plan. The more I write, the more I LOVE to write. Hopefully this will be a continuing trend. But I am still getting to know myself as an adult writer. I wrote all the time when i was a kid, and now that 'being like child' is more important to me than ever, I must find my writing voice again. AND it will hopefully have the added benefit of kickstarting my research work. So for a while I am might need to FORCE myself to write everyday, and this little blog will help me out! SO, I am going to be begin this enterprise by addressing a host of topics that have been on my mind.

Get ready for the N Word!
Nipple. There I said it. And now for some TMI. I have nipples. I know, it's true. You maybe are thinking that this would be an obvious statement, and so did I. Until I am in the hospital post-birth, trying to nurse my new baby, and my nipples are refusing to pop up like the nurse is saying should happen. Flat. Flat as a pancake. This nurse helps me to use a nipple shield, a clear, thin little silicon device that resembles the nipple of a baby bottle. My little man's powerful sucking action was able to achieve what mother nature could not - breaking the scar tissue (a genetic defect) that was turning my nipples into scared turtles. After several weeks I was, with a great amount of patience and perseverence on both our parts, able to wean him off of the shield and nursing progressed well after that. Although my let-down was never very much until several months down the road.
I have many other accomplishments in my life, academic, relationships, work, house. But successfully breastfeeding in a world that mainly discourages feels like one of my best successes. Encouraging breastfeeding is all the rage, of course, but it often amounts to just lip service. How can your doctor be said to be "promoting" BF when s/he also takes kickbacks and samples from formula companies and hands them to you while saying, "If you are worried your baby is not getting enough milk, just give him some formula." WHAT? That just starts a cycle of decline! AND it sends the message to the mother that she SHOULD be worrying about her baby not getting enough, never mind that Baby seems healthy and happy and thriving.

FORMULA COMPANIES are NOT humanitarian organizations, and don't forget it!

They are BIG BUSINESS. BIG BIG BIG BUSINESS. As such, it is their job to sell you their product, even and especially at the expense of something wholesome and healthy and natural that costs almost nothing monetarily. And they peddle the supposed 'convenience' and 'goodness' of their product with all the cunningness that they posess.

We must be just as resourceful, and just as unashamed of the choices that we make, even when they are counter-cultural.

More to come, y'all!